How To Fix A Relationship

by Sarge Denver on June 26, 2011

All across the world today, literally hundreds of couples have hit a snag in their relationships as a result of frequent squabbling, apathy in the man or woman or both, infidelity, or, worse, abuse. In cases in which the husband and wife quarrel often as a result of mis communication and other rectifiable causes, they need to learn what it would take to fix a broken relationship.

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The first step to learning how to fix a relationship is by recognizing two simple truths, namely 1) it will not be easy to mend a broken relationship and 2) both the husband and wife should be committed into making their relationship work once more. Some individuals often make the mistake in believing that they can easily win back their spouse’s affections. Hurts that have been inflicted deeply will make it difficult for the aggrieved party to trust and to love again. To build up a relationship once more, both parties should be willing to give their love another try.

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If the commitment is there, the next step is to do an honest self-evaluation. When marriages start to break down, usually the husband and the wife have faults. It could be that the wife is meek that she allows her husband to be domineering or even abusive. The reserve can also occur wherein the husband feels he is being “emasculated” by his wife’s constant nagging. Both the man and woman should recognize their respective faults and be committed to changing themselves.

Communicate with your spouse is the step that follows. If you cannot talk peacefully without blowing your temper, you can ask a close, unbiased friend or a marriage counselor to serve as a mediator. Take the opportunity to discover each other’s sentiments and listen to them very carefully. After all, you cannot change yourself if you are not aware of your own faults.

Once everything is out in the open, pledge to change yourself for the better. Never force your spouse to change the things you don’t like in him or her. Always initiate the change in yourself. For example, if you have been nagging your husband for his shortcomings, learn to show him respect by recognizing his achievements and praising them, even if they seem minor to you. If you haven’t been showing your appreciation to your wife, you can do so by giving her gifts like flowers or candy.

Never use your children as “tools” to fix a broken relationship. Nothing can be more hurtful to a son or daughter than to hear their parents say, “We’re only sticking together for your sake.” You are indirectly putting the blame for your troubled marriage on your children’s shoulders. Broken relationships should be resolved between you and your spouse alone. Keep your children out of it.

Last but not least, forgive your spouse and move on. If you are able to forgive each other’s faults and take the necessary steps to change, you will be able to heal your broken relationship and rekindle the love that was believed lost.

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